Friday, March 03, 2006

And as he staggered through the gate A lassie came just one day too late

Day 15 of the great stone sober experiment. To answer your question, no. We have not been on a bender. Keep up the faith! Sometimes our current technological situation gets a bit screwy around Casa Borracho and it's hard for us to post to Blogger. For instance, no photos from the Razr can we put up on this blog.

We have lots of photo updates coming real soon, though:

-Bookstore puppies. We don't remember what their names are or what breed they represent, but cuteness abounds. When they make their public debut, people are going to be flooding Myopic like we gots those Panda babies from the D.C. Zoo. They're that cute. We'll keep you updated. If we can get photos of the winter baby Ethan Tohma and the puppies TOGETHER, the world might fold in on itself and implode from quantum inter-dimensional cuteness. We'll get on that.

-Bands from the past few weeks of note: Macronympha/Kevin Drumm/Wolf Eyes show was a bit of a let down. Mr. Drumm doesn't play often, so it was peachy keen to see him lay down 15 minutes of hideous airport runway blast. Apparently he's a big deal in the Chicago financial world, too? Strange. Google for the facts on that, you kibbutz sluts!

Wolf Eyes were okay, not as good as the Reo Speedwagon meets Suicide-ish glam-doom of, say '99 or '00, but there was lots of gong-hitting and tribal stuff with guitar dash and crowd-interactive shouting. Dece. They have a LOT of merch. Do they put out a record every hour? We have a Wolf Eyes w/ Spykes CD/art-junk combo pack that we bought in 2002 that we still haven't listened to more than once. What can we say? We're that type of record collector. Someday we'll sell it on Ebay for a $1.25 and two packets of Taco Bell Mild Sauce to some Flock of Seagulls from Maryland who thinks Nurse With Wound and Current 93 are real "in" and has a problem with "melody" and "western trappings".

Macronympha were the real cause celeb for the night, as they augmented their entirely average noise workout with a stage show consisting of two identically corseted goth chicks making out for the duration of their set. We felt bad for the goth chicks. It's hard to look interested making out and dishwater bland over the clothes boob and butt groping and through her tight as nature allows leather skirt butt sniffing with another woman for over a half hour, especially on a stage in front of a bunch of noise music losers on a night when Animal Collective is playing across town, and you are doing your best to entertain but are so obviously not a lesbian. And the band sucked horribly. Every bad noise cliche you could think up. We're sure that the Logan Auditorium was where all the hotties were that night, and why the Bottle was a epic sausage factory of conversations about how "unconfrontational" the last Whitehouse gig was. Those poor girls. All those noise music losers (present company excluded, natch). If you laid all the boners in the Bottle that night end on end, you'd have a monorail to Neptune.

Does anyone over the age of, say, 25 make out, really? Like just kissing and over the clothes fondling for more than ten minutes anymore? Maybe on the second or third date, or whenever the first time things get a bit steamy, sure. But after that? Hmm. Maybe the OGFP board is not as romantically inclined as it should be. Or maybe inspiration is flagging a bit?




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1 comment:

manormarsupial said...

funny post, i got a few good sniggers from it. your description of the racy Macronympha stage show & fan scene pretty much prove this previously vague theory i've had about certain breed of noise hound: they're just confused Lords of Acid fans.

they got into this racket for the leather pants and drugs years ago, but have now gone into that sad lonely place of middle aged fetishist-collector types on vacation in thailand, or something. american otaku splendor?

now i'm not saying the worst is always true for noiseniks and i'm not even one to judge cause i don't know the scene at all, only some of the 'music' over the years. still, if the reality is anything like what's described in this story about a recent Whitehouse show in Chicago - http://www.sexwrecks.com/2005/12/molested_at_the.html - then it might be time to , um, run like hell?